Senator Jon KylJon Kyl is a Republican US Senator from Arizona. He joined the Senate in 1995 after eight years in the House of Representatives, reaching the level of Minority Whip, responsible for maintaining party discipline. He recently announced that he will leave the Senate at the end of his term in 2013.
This 26-year record may now be remembered for one stellar moment, thanks to the comedian Stephen Colbert.
Last Friday, in the midst of the debate to cut off Federal funding for Planned Parenthood (see separate EA analysis), Kyl informed the Senate that performing abortions is "well over 90 percent of what Planned Parenthood does". Planned Parenthood responded that 90 percent of its services are preventative, and only 3 percent are abortion-related.
A spokesperson for Kyl then claimed the senator’s remark "was not intended to be a factual statement".
Stephen Colbert, the host of The Colbert Report and a forceful presence on Twitter as @StephenAtHome, picked up on the incident. Soon he was building a Twitter shrine to Senator Kyl with #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement. This was the stream of testaments to the Senator over the course of 24 hours on Tuesday and Wednesday:
Jon Kyl thinks no one can see him when he puts a paper bag on his head. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl was named after the Quebec town, Jonquière, which is fitting because he ate all of its residents.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl bought a SodaStream so he could drink *carbonated* tears of the poor. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl invented a chemical-free method for bleaching recycled paper pulp. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl claims the craziest thing he's ever done was that time he ate pancakes for dinner. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl is the only person who can sneeze with his penis. He calls it a "sneenis." #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Everything you would only do in the privacy of your own home, Jon Kyl prefers to do on a subway car.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl can unhinge his jaw like a python to swallow small rodents whole. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
The secret to Jon Kyl's success can be found on page 53 of the Necronomicon. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Every halloween Jon Kyl dresses up as a sexy Mitch Daniels.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Along a certain stretch of Mexican highway, Jon Kyl is known as El Autoestopisto Blanco Borracho.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl destroyed love in 1973. All feelings since then have been but a shadow of the original concept.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl actually prefers Hydrox to Oreos.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl developed his own line of hair care products just so he could test them on bunnies. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl has a shrine to Scooter from the Muppet Show.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl's torso is covered in superfluous nipples.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl can, and will, deny that you're a jolly good fellow.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl has the world's most extensive catalogue of snuff films.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl was sent from the future to kill Sarah Conner.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl is an accomplished nude hula dancer. He is not welcome in Hawaii. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl is so mean he once shot a man just for snoring.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
For the past ten years, Jon Kyl has been two children in a very convincing Jon Kyl suit. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl sponsored S.410, which would ban happiness.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl calls the underside of his Senate seat: "The Booger Graveyard." #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl cheated on Sandra Bullock.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl is 90% prune juice. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl let a game-winning ground ball roll through his legs in Game 6 of the '86 World Series.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Once a year, Jon Kyl retreats to the Arizona Desert and deposits 2 million egg sacs under the sand.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
In 2009, Jon Kyl lost $380,000 wagering on dwarf tossing.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Citing religious reasons, Jon Kyl refuses to utter the number 8.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl murdered a caricaturist for drawing him with a basketball instead of a surfboard. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl once ate a badger he hit with his car.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl = ax2 + bx + c #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl holds the Guinness World Record for "Largest Collection of Penis Enlargers." #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Carly Simon wrote that song about Jon Kyl.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl has a $1000-a-day Lik-M-Aid habit.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl calls all Asians "Neil" no matter what their name is.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl's knees bend both ways. He's part racehorse.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl assassinated Archduke Ferdinand.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
On weekends, Jon Kyl shoots manatees with paintball guns.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Legally, Jon Kyl cannot be within 100 yards of Helen Mirren.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl was the CEO of Enron when they took all those people's pension money. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
Jon Kyl is one of Gaddafi's sexy female ninja guards.#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement