Monday
Nov242008
Why We Love Conservapedia: On Guard Against Atheists (and Liberals)
Monday, November 24, 2008 at 20:05
As the guardian of all things truthful against "liberal bias", Conservapedia would be expected to defend us from the scourge of atheism. Still you have to admire the tenacity of the fight as it identifies "Atheism and Communism", "Atheism and Mass Murder", and "Targeting of Young People by Atheists on the Internet".
One contributor was so diligent that he identified a medical condition suffered only by atheists:
''Atheistic fluff'' is a medical condition suffered by atheists.
As a consequency of renouncing God and accepting atheistic doctrines such as evolution, atheists often develop a layer of downy fluff, covering the groin, buttocks, and in some extreme cases, the face. -
-
Charles Darwin developed a severe case of atheistic fluff, covering most of his body, after publishing ''The Origin of Species''. Some critics believe that Michael Moore may be suffering from atheistic fluff, despite his claim to be a Christian.
Darwin in an advanced stage of atheistic fluff
Atheistic fluff can be cured through abstinence, prayer and Bible study.-
Unfortunately, Conservapedia editors had an unexpected attack of caution and deleted this important medical evidence. On the other hand, they have maintained their vigilance against the related condition "Liberal Fluff", the entry for which reads:
Liberal fluffers are employed extensively in the entertainment industry in Hollywood, where they promote Hollywood values.
And speaking of liberals, Conservapedia has a helpful guide to their devious "Liberal Tools" , which apparently include:
1. Deceit
2. Halitosis.
3. Mumbling.
4. Interrupting speakers
5. Eating with their mouth open.
6. Holding conservatives to a higher standard than they hold themselves.
7. Bullying.
8. Hypnosis.
9. Censorship.
10. Custard.
11. Capturing and misleading youth.
12. Sowing division among conservatives, such as atheists complaining that one particular prayer
might offend someone of another religion.
13. Desensitization.
14. "Jamming", by Bob Marley.
15. Conversion.
16. Undermining religion.
17. Mocking conservative science.
18. Portraying criminals and miscreants as being conservative when, in fact, they are not.
19. Dismissing valid conservative criticism for no reason.
20. Knocking on doors and then running away.
21. Using the term "Karajou" as a pejorative.
22. Insisting on "globalist" terms and phrasing to the detriment of American English and meanings. This
is an anti-American effort to promote "one worldism."
23. Poisonous frogs.
24. The Gay Bomb.
25. Liberace.
One contributor was so diligent that he identified a medical condition suffered only by atheists:
''Atheistic fluff'' is a medical condition suffered by atheists.
As a consequency of renouncing God and accepting atheistic doctrines such as evolution, atheists often develop a layer of downy fluff, covering the groin, buttocks, and in some extreme cases, the face. -
-
Charles Darwin developed a severe case of atheistic fluff, covering most of his body, after publishing ''The Origin of Species''. Some critics believe that Michael Moore may be suffering from atheistic fluff, despite his claim to be a Christian.
Darwin in an advanced stage of atheistic fluff
Atheistic fluff can be cured through abstinence, prayer and Bible study.-
Unfortunately, Conservapedia editors had an unexpected attack of caution and deleted this important medical evidence. On the other hand, they have maintained their vigilance against the related condition "Liberal Fluff", the entry for which reads:
Liberal fluffers are employed extensively in the entertainment industry in Hollywood, where they promote Hollywood values.
And speaking of liberals, Conservapedia has a helpful guide to their devious "Liberal Tools" , which apparently include:
1. Deceit
2. Halitosis.
3. Mumbling.
4. Interrupting speakers
5. Eating with their mouth open.
6. Holding conservatives to a higher standard than they hold themselves.
7. Bullying.
8. Hypnosis.
9. Censorship.
10. Custard.
11. Capturing and misleading youth.
12. Sowing division among conservatives, such as atheists complaining that one particular prayer
might offend someone of another religion.
13. Desensitization.
14. "Jamming", by Bob Marley.
15. Conversion.
16. Undermining religion.
17. Mocking conservative science.
18. Portraying criminals and miscreants as being conservative when, in fact, they are not.
19. Dismissing valid conservative criticism for no reason.
20. Knocking on doors and then running away.
21. Using the term "Karajou" as a pejorative.
22. Insisting on "globalist" terms and phrasing to the detriment of American English and meanings. This
is an anti-American effort to promote "one worldism."
23. Poisonous frogs.
24. The Gay Bomb.
25. Liberace.
tagged Atheists, Conservapedia, Liberals in Political Humour
Atheists, Conservapedia, Liberals in Political Humour
Reader Comments (2)
Michael Moore may have the symptoms of the fluff, but Conservapedia left out George W. Bush, another Christian. He attends an Episcopal (ECUSA) church, a proliferator of 'The Gay Bomb.' Bush must have threatened the parish with sanctions, so he could carry out inspections. Either that or he is immune to the fluff.
".......most people today do not worship the baals and asheroths that once guaranteed the fertility of land and herds, but millions pursue the American dream, a fine home, car, vacations, clothes, status and wealth. Everywhere they look they see others doing the same, driven on by an endless stream of propaganda produced by the corporations, their government, their neighbors, and fed by their own inner desires. When parents buy into the American dream, the expensive car, the nice house, the vacations and the cruises, they can expect their children to adopt the same values, and buy into the sexual revolution as well. People today do not worship a statue of Mars, the god of war, nor do they worship the figure of an emperor, but millions resonate to images of precision bombing, the sight of aircraft carriers, and tough talk by a president dressed in a flak jacket and surrounded by smartly dressed men and women in uniform."
http://www.virtueonline.org/portal/modules/news/article.php?storyid=9416